Daily Point of View: Up Close and Personal

Pondering

2011-06-07T06:54:00.000-07:00

I've been pondering on something the past couple of days. Asking myself, and God, questions. What is it about our "stuff"... material stuff... that makes us want vast amounts of it which we hoard? We live in a world of overworked and worn out yet we want to collect more and more stuff, which we are then responsible for. What is this? See, I have someone that I know... and she has a lot of 'stuff'. I look and wonder, "Why are you keeping all of this? There would be so much less clutter if you would get rid of these piles. Would you feel like you could breathe if you weren't being suffocated by so much stuff?" But of course, I haven't said this to her. And she not only hoards "stuff" that makes me feel like I'm suffocating in her home, she hoards food. I'm not joking. She's a single, senior citizen and has food, food, food. Pantries are stuffed to the point that things fall out on you if you open the cabinet. If you go to put something back in the refrigerator, you waste 5 minutes of you life standing there wondering where it came from in the first place cuz you sure as heck can't figure out where to put it. And she's in to "preparedness for emergencies" so she has a storage room stocked full of food.. like 25 lb. bags of dry goods and such. Where is the line crossed in being prepared and this being a sickness? I've been trying to analyze the situation. What I'm pondering are the following questions:
1.) Is this fear? Maybe from experience of a time of not having enough, one stockpiles out of fear of ever being in that place again?
2.) Where does faith and trust come in? Does one, in this place, not trust God's provision for them?
3.) Is the hoarding of things partially about desire? In the gathering and collecting (or hoarding) of things, is it out of desire for an identity... one ties their identity and who they are to what they own?
4.) Is there a line that is crossed between identity being wrapped up in our possessions and having our home reflect who we are? I mean, when you die and someone that didn't know you, walks into your home, you want them to feel that they know you in some small way, by what you have in your home. It's an expression of you. But is there a line that is crossed over into something entirely different when staking your identity while you are living, on those things in your home? Do they define you?

I ponder these things because (1) I am concerned for this person. I care for her and with her increasing health issues, she has an inability to care for her things. So it would make sense to me to purge and get rid of things you don't need, don't use, and simplify so you don't feel overwhelmed with things that need attention. I mean, it's a health hazard to open a kitchen cupboard! You know, the commercial of a kid cleaning their room where they just stuff everything and then when the door is opened, it all falls out? Uh, yeah... that's every cabinet in the kitchen, every closet... everything. The disorganization feels like my brain short circuits every time I look behind a door or in a drawer. I so badly want to help this person but also realize that not everyone thinks like me. That maybe, for some people, being able to own and see all their things is a reminder to them, of life... that these things represent their life. However, I am concerned for her safety and well being with all her "stuff".

Another reason I ponder this that I don't ever want to be one of these people on any level. When I was younger, I saved everything. And I mean, everything. I think I wanted to have reminders that my life meant something. That it was important. That I was important. The more I understand God's view of me and experience His grace, the less important those "things" are. It's easier and easier to let things go. For the most part, my home is furnished very minimally. I no longer have collections of things everywhere. Yes, sometimes I miss those things because they were tied to a memory. But, for the most part, I am relieved not to have tons of stuff collecting dust in my house always needing attention. I am in a perpetual state of mind of "clean out and simplify"... because it frees me.

Let me ask you this... if you had a friend you were concerned about, living in such a way, would you offer to help her? Would you say anything at all? I mean, what if she doesn't even see it as an issue... yet, deep down, I know this isn't true because of things she says. I see her exhausted and depressed. And I know from experience, how my house looks, is how I feel... and vice versa. My house is often messy and cluttered to me... and I HATE it.. because I feel messy and cluttered inside too. It's a reflection. I am constantly trying to clean out and organize so my energy can be spent being creative and loving my kids.. not weighed down with piles. It is a process. But if I was never moving forward in this process, I'd be so severely depressed, I couldn't function. But maybe that's just me.

Any words of wisdom? Thoughts? Anyone?

dropped the ball

2009-07-05T08:45:00.000-07:00

Well, for the very small following I had on this blog, you see I dropped the ball on the daily photographs. Life just got super crazy and then I was robbed and my camera was stolen. Maybe another time.....

April 26

2009-04-26T22:06:00.001-07:00

OK, I don't normally sew clothes but, I have a top I purchased similar to this pattern and I love it. I found the pattern and decided to make some. I mean, how hard can it be when there are no set in sleeves, no buttons, zippers, snaps.. nothing! Just elastic! I'll be making the short sleeve version. I'm also going to add on to the length of the pattern and make a dress! Max told me I needed a summer dress! LOL! So I'm gonna' make one!

April 25

2009-04-26T22:04:00.001-07:00

All in a days work. I know, you are wondering what this is... I sat at my friend, Fran's house, and cut and entire ream of paper needed to create signatures in 6 journals I have been commissioned to make. I got it all cut, folded, and signatures together for all of them!

April 24

2009-04-26T21:44:00.000-07:00

Someone please buy this thing from me! I love it but it's taking up way too much room in my apartment! If you are local and want to take this off my hands, e-mail me!

April 23

2009-04-26T21:42:00.001-07:00

Love this time of year when all the cactus are blooming! It's so hard to get a good shot of the Saguaro though because they are so tall! I'd love an overhead shot but that just isn't possible!

April 22

2009-04-26T21:40:00.003-07:00

Max and I haul about 5-6 gallons of water out to his little garden every day through my bedroom.. since the garden is just outside my room. Here are some of his flowers coming up!

April 21

2009-04-26T21:40:00.001-07:00

April 20

2009-04-26T21:38:00.002-07:00

Check out the bee in the top left... look how loaded his legs are with pollen!

April 19

2009-04-26T21:38:00.001-07:00

April 18

2009-04-26T21:37:00.001-07:00

Hummingbird's delight!

April 17

2009-04-26T21:35:00.000-07:00

April 16

2009-04-26T21:34:00.001-07:00

Kenzy often climbs in bed with Sam when Sam is just waking up. He does the same thing at bedtime for a short while as well. Aren't they cute?

April 15

2009-04-26T21:32:00.000-07:00

Max the gardener with his first little tomato!

April 14

2009-04-26T21:31:00.001-07:00

Large group brunch for our end of the year Women's Bible study.

April 13

2009-04-26T21:29:00.001-07:00

My latest addiction... Scrabble through Facebook! This word, Validate, was the first word I have ever done using all my letters in one play!

April 12

2009-04-14T15:16:00.000-07:00

Chinese for Easter! I hadn't had Chinese food in months and months so that's what we had for Easter! Here's my fortune... a little blurry. "A fascinating prject is in your future." I like this one!

April 11

2009-04-14T15:14:00.001-07:00

hand bound photo book... making several to sell!

April 10

2009-04-14T15:13:00.001-07:00

April 9

2009-04-14T15:11:00.001-07:00

This time of year it is hard for me to stay on the road. I keep wanting to pull over to photograph sites as this! They are in such vivid color right now. Pinks, orange, peach, yellow... they are just stunning! And yes, I did pull over to the side of the road for this!

April 8

2009-04-09T06:50:00.001-07:00

I invited myself to mom's for dinner ordering turnip greens and cornbread and look at all the other yummy things I got to go with it! It was so delicious and one of my favorite kind of meals... simple country vegetables. I'll take it any day over most anything else. I brought left overs home for another meal!

April 7

2009-04-09T06:48:00.001-07:00

I know I posted this image on my other blog too but I just love it so much! I love the little note in the seed pod!

April 6

2009-04-09T06:47:00.001-07:00

Got my hair cut! We took a few inches off the bottom. Much better now, although it's extremely rare for me to wear it all down like this. I actually pulled it up in the front before the day was out.

April 5

2009-04-09T06:44:00.000-07:00

Max would never come inside if he weren't forced. And now that he's so into gardening, he really loves being out! He's digging a new spot for more plants. And ya'll, he even spends his own money on plants and seeds!

April 4

2009-04-09T06:41:00.001-07:00

Practicing for our day at Castles 'N Coasters! However, except for the log ride, Sam is the only one brave enough for roller coasters! Max and I just watched!

April 3

2009-04-09T06:40:00.000-07:00

Such sweetness!

April 2

2009-04-09T06:38:00.001-07:00

YIKES! I pulled up my bath mat to wash it and look what is happening to my tub! Obviously it was very unprofessionally refinished at one point and now the coating is bubbling up and peeling where my bath mat goes! Major problem....

April 1

2009-04-09T06:36:00.001-07:00

March 31

2009-04-09T06:35:00.001-07:00

Back in business... but my camera man obviously was trying to capture his friend, not me! I seem to be doing a lot of kid haircuts lately! It's fun doing them outside since it's so nice... and no clean up!

March 30

2009-04-09T06:32:00.001-07:00

Have no clue what kind of plant this is but the flowers are so beautiful! It's in a friend's front yard.

March 29

2009-04-02T06:27:00.000-07:00

I love how this particular desert plant, the name escapes me, looks like the tips have burst into flames stretched to the sky. Hummingbirds love these blooms!

March 28

2009-04-02T06:26:00.001-07:00

Yes, I'm still fascinated that flowers can grow from rocks!

March 27

2009-04-02T06:24:00.001-07:00

My favorite desert tree is in bloom right now! The Palo Verde. I love the gorgeous green of the trunk and the vivid yellow burst! I'd love to have one of these... or more, in my yard. If I ever have a home where I can landscape it myself, I will get one. The can grow really huge too!

March 26

2009-04-02T06:20:00.001-07:00

Help, I'm behind again!!!
I'm getting my hair cut on Monday, way overdue. I haven't had a haircut in months and now it's so long that it takes forever to stretch out my natural curl. I was thinking of cutting my hair to this length. But, now that I look at this picture, I don't think I'm ready to go that short. I've not had my hair one length at this particular length since oh... maybe when I was about 7? I'm just not sure yet. I think I need a few inches more to be comfortable. Right now, it hits the bottom of my bra strap. I'm ready to lose 3 inches, not about 8. Thoughts?

March 25

2009-03-28T16:44:00.001-07:00

LOVE Goodwill! Got a couple pair of cropped pants and the green tag was half off! So, I got both pair for only $7.50! The green ones are Anne Taylor too! I love the funky ones. I'll be wearing those when I'm in a really artistic mood! ;)

March 24

2009-03-28T16:42:00.001-07:00

Max with one of his best friends, Emma... stuffed in the closet! They have always loved being together. They have been friends for over 5 years! I just love this little girl and would be thrilled if one of my boys grew up and married her! ;)

March 23

2009-03-28T16:40:00.001-07:00

Within each of these ribbons were rolled up bills... a gift paying for my entire month's rent for April given to me by several families at church. I am so blessed and overwhelmed!

March 22

2009-03-23T23:02:00.001-07:00

Whoops, she cracked and has a broken leg. As this piece dried, the leg ended up breaking.... thankfully, not off. But, I realized that it was suppose to be this way. God does powerful work in our "waiting" when we are broken. It's often the brokenness that leads us into the waiting. I wonder how often God is waiting on me... instead of the other way around.

March 21

2009-03-23T23:01:00.000-07:00

Jewels of summer! YUM!

March 20

2009-03-23T23:00:00.000-07:00

March 19

2009-03-19T22:16:00.000-07:00

Ready for bed... Kenzy and I photo boothed! He's much cuter than my tired self!

March 18

2009-03-18T21:48:00.001-07:00

Took the boys to the Desert Botanical Gardens today and I was so happy that some of the cactus had started blooming. I'll go again in a week or so for more photos... hopefully it won't get too hot. I need some time to go alone with my camera so I can poke along with my own thoughts taking pictures at my own pace.

March 17

2009-03-18T21:47:00.001-07:00

I'm likin' sepia in photo booth.

March 16

2009-03-17T07:04:00.001-07:00

OK, so I had to post two pictures today. Max and I were being really silly with photo booth and since he made his cool mask, we were trying to get scary looks. LOL!

March 15

2009-03-17T07:03:00.001-07:00

Mom joins in the photo booth fun!

March 14

2009-03-17T07:02:00.001-07:00

I really should put on at least mascara every day if I don't wear any other make up. Seriously. At least Max doesn't mind!

March 13

2009-03-17T07:00:00.001-07:00

I was here.
A picnic in the grass with Max. This kid would live outside if I let him. He insisted we eat out.

March 12

2009-03-17T06:59:00.000-07:00

Photo Booth Pop Art

March 11

2009-03-17T06:58:00.000-07:00

We've discovered photo booth so we are having some fun. Here I am with my boys and one of their best friend's, Sam S.

March 10

2009-03-17T06:54:00.001-07:00

Juice tastes better in a pretty glass just like tea tastes better in a pretty cup. My sister sent me these topaz wine glasses years ago and they rarely get used because I rarely drink. So, I decided to start using them for juice. In this case, my mango peach juice is almost the same color as the glass so it doesn't show up well but it sure tastes good!

March 9

2009-03-17T06:53:00.001-07:00

While I have been published in a couple of magazines, this is my first book publication and I'm really happy about it.

March 8

2009-03-17T06:52:00.001-07:00

I love this picture because I am always so amazed how something so beautiful and delicate can grow amongst such dryness and sharp rock.

March 8

2009-03-17T06:47:00.001-07:00

Kenzy loves being on shoulders. Unfortunately, Sam's are a little small for a perch!

March 7

2009-03-17T06:46:00.001-07:00

Tea is so much better in a pretty cup instead of a chunky coffee mug! Except it doesn't hold as much!

March 6

2009-03-17T06:45:00.001-07:00

March 5

2009-03-17T06:44:00.001-07:00

March 4

2009-03-17T06:42:00.001-07:00

Doesn't Sam have the most amazing eyes? I snapped this on a bus while heading out on a field trip with his class.

March 2

2009-03-17T06:41:00.002-07:00

March 1

2009-03-17T06:41:00.001-07:00

Feb. 28

2009-03-17T06:39:00.001-07:00

I love photographing tree bark more than pretty much anything else. It's the most fascinating thing ever. While I've only done one painting with my tree bark images as reference, a series will be happening soon.

Feb. 27

2009-03-17T06:38:00.000-07:00

Feb. 26

2009-03-17T06:35:00.001-07:00

My sweet friend, Stephanie brought me flowers. Kenzy had to inspect. Keeping this cat off counters is proving to be torturous for all of us. He came with this really bad habit and it's a tough one to break. But I am persistent. Unfortunately, so is he.

Feb. 25

2009-03-17T06:31:00.001-07:00

Feb. 24

2009-03-17T06:28:00.001-07:00

The desert is blooming at Canaan In The Desert Prayer Garden. What a peaceful place!

Feb. 23

2009-03-17T06:27:00.001-07:00

Feb. 22

2009-03-17T06:26:00.001-07:00

This is mine and Chuck's 23rd wedding anniversary, although we are separated. He gave me flowers anyway.

Feb. 21

2009-03-17T06:25:00.001-07:00

From my sweet Max.

Feb. 20

2009-03-17T06:24:00.001-07:00

My new apartment number!

Feb. 19

2009-03-17T06:23:00.003-07:00

2009-03-17T06:23:00.001-07:00

Feb. 18

2009-03-17T06:21:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite cacti. I love the waves. They remind me of a Spanish dancer's dress flowing as she dances.

Feb. 17

2009-03-17T06:18:00.000-07:00

Feb. 16

2009-03-17T06:17:00.001-07:00

Catch up time.. The moon on an early morning walk.

YIKES!

2009-03-12T20:11:00.000-07:00

I'm a month behind!!! I have pictures but haven't uploaded them here due to other crisis going on in my life. I'll hopefully catch up some over the weekend since my boys will be with their dad and I'll be here alone.

Feb. 15

2009-02-15T20:30:00.001-08:00

One of my favorite breakfasts... steel cut oats with a tiny drizzle of pure maple syrup, half a banana, and some milk. YUMMY!

Feb.14

2009-02-15T20:27:00.000-08:00

From Max

Feb. 13

2009-02-15T20:25:00.001-08:00

This is much of what life is about right now. Packing and getting ready for the boys and I to move. I have a system ... all boxes get a number and letter code representing the room it will go in. I then have a notebook, or in the case of this move, index cards with a number column, a room code column, and then space to write the contents of the box. It makes it so much easier to find things. I just got more boxes today so I'm making progress but it does feel so sllllooooooowwww at times.

Feb. 12

2009-02-15T20:24:00.001-08:00

One of my regular types of lunch or dinners. It's pretty tasty!

Feb. 11

2009-02-15T20:23:00.001-08:00

My sister sent me this mug many years ago. In case you can't read it, it says "These aren't freckles, they're just a whole bunch of teeny tiny tans." I use it often for my tea.

Feb. 10

2009-02-15T20:19:00.000-08:00

I found Kenzy sitting in Chuck's sink in the kitchen, like he has good sense. Kenzy's first mom, the breeder, let the cats run all over the kitchen counters and it is proving to be a mountainous task to break him of this bad, bad habit. I don't know if he thought sitting down inside a sink didn't count or what. He was immediately removed but no matter what I try, he is persistent. But gosh, he sure is cute!

Feb. 9

2009-02-09T14:08:00.001-08:00

This tree is in my neighbors yard right at the corner by my mailbox. I started on my walk when I noticed these spring blossoms and ran back inside for my camera!

Feb. 8

2009-02-08T16:52:00.001-08:00

A storm blew in last night so we had rain and winds. This was the sky when I came out of my Sunday morning Bible study class heading into the church service. The sun has come out but it's still cloudy... but very pretty. And it cooled off again too!

Feb. 7

2009-02-07T19:50:00.001-08:00

I always think that if I were going to redecorate something in my house, I might go a little funky. But no, I always gravitate to the same colors. I went to home depot dreaming today. I brought paint swatches home and realized that they perfectly match my favorite throw pillows! Too funny.

Feb 6

2009-02-06T14:33:00.000-08:00

OK, so today, while at the mall checking out prices on some things in Costco, I ended up caving over a Philly cheese steak with onions, peppers, and provolone. Not something in my usual diet, for sure. However, I am not trying to lose any more weight or I'll have my mom breathing down my neck so, I ate. It was delicious! But... I only ate half. ;)

Feb 5

2009-02-06T14:31:00.001-08:00

Doesn't this little thing look like it should be in a Dr. Seuss book? This little ball of pollen represents misery this time of year. I'm already starting to feel the spring allergy season blooming. My nose has been itching and a little sniffly. I love the weather this time of year but I often end up losing my voice in spring. I rarely get congested... just have sinus drainage and lose my voice. I hate it. But the little yellow tree sure is cute!

Feb 4

2009-02-04T08:30:00.001-08:00

I finally remembered to take my camera on my walk this morning to snap a photo of this sign. I actually need to go back and get a better one because I want to make an iron on transfer of it for a t-shirt. Won't it make a great t-shirt?! I know I've been dumped on enough in my life to wear it with conviction!

Feb. 3

2009-02-04T08:29:00.001-08:00

This is a pretty accurate picture of my daily life... laundry. Some times I feel like it's all I do. And it's my most hated "chore".

Feb 2

2009-02-02T15:39:00.001-08:00

Stockings and dress shoes... only two things get these on my body. A wedding or a funeral. Today it was the later, unfortunately, although I'm not a big wedding person either but certainly better than a funeral. I think it's been two years since I have worn hose and dress shoes! I do admit though... they do make me feel really feminine. Maybe I should wear them more often and get out of exercise clothes.

Feb. 1

2009-02-01T16:41:00.000-08:00

I know, I know. No one can figure out what this is. This has been my reality for the past 5 months. This is a picture of my floor... covered in drywall dust. If it hasn't been drywall dust, it was saw dust, or dirt, or mud... you name it, it's been caked on my floors for 5 months as Chuck renovates the back room. No matter how much I clean, this is what it looks like the very next day. No wonder I feel tired just being in this house right now. It's awful. And dirty floors are my pet peeve! UGH!

Jan. 31

2009-02-01T16:38:00.000-08:00

I went to Ikea, spur of the moment, with my mom. I'm rarely so spontaneous! I got these cut little hooks to use for back packs! Mine is the green one. Sam is red and Max is black. I think they are too cute. However, these were certainly not the only thing I WANTED to buy!

Jan. 30

2009-02-01T16:37:00.000-08:00

The winning board I played against my step-dad. Guess who won....

Jan. 29

2009-02-01T16:36:00.001-08:00

Max has struggled learning to read and spell this year but all of the sudden, something clicked and now I find him reading by himself often. He's doing really well! We love books by Laura Numeroff.

Jan.28

2009-02-01T16:34:00.000-08:00

My view from the car driving home from my counseling appt. Soon these mountains will be covered with a yellow blanket of wildflowers.

Jan 27

2009-01-28T12:32:00.000-08:00

I was so excited when I pulled in from kid drop off in the morning and a hawk flew overhead. He lit in the tree next door and was immediately joined by a partner. I ran and got the camera...
This pair has lived in our neighborhood for a long time. They nested in a girlfriend's tree last year! I love watching them.

Jan 26

2009-01-28T12:31:00.000-08:00

So my kids think I'm weird... but I was out of grown up kind of bandaids and if you have to wear a bright yellow bandaid, it must have a smiley face on it!

Jan. 25

2009-01-28T12:29:00.001-08:00

OK, so it turned out a little blurry but, this is yet another sweet thing from Max. I was amazed how the strong fragrance from something so small. This is like a mini-daffodil but I can't remember the real name.. Is it Jonquils?

Jan 24

2009-01-28T12:21:00.000-08:00

grocery shopping day

Jan. 23

2009-01-23T17:09:00.001-08:00

Kenzy's perch. He climbs up me to get up on my shoulder like this. He loves to snuggle in my neck. He's so sweet.

Jan 22

2009-01-22T13:13:00.001-08:00

Reliable Pete and Jake. Ready for my morning walk that I love so much.

Jan. 21

2009-01-21T10:47:00.001-08:00

This... THIS is just about as close to heaven as I get. Painting in an empty house in total and complete silence. It is bliss!